a better mouse trap

Jim Nantz jim at COTTAGESOFT.COM
Tue Feb 3 22:06:49 MST 1998

Earlier today someone mentioned something about a better mouse trap and it
reminded me of something I heard once.

In 1994 a better mouse trap was invented.  It never made it to market
because of what happened after the inventor submitted it to the patent office.

The PETA crowd complained that it would cause unnecessary pain and
suffering when it killed the mice.

The NAACM (national association for the advancement of colored mice)
threatened to file a lawsuit because tests had shown that it caught an
unacceptably high ratio of black mice to white mice.

The hispanic rodents action league complained because in its tests a
disproportionate number of mice caught had illegally entered the country
from Mexico.

The Animal Liberation Front threatened legal action because the trap was so
effective that it would cause the starvation of untold millions of cats and
snakes because of the reduction in their food supply.

So many companies expressed such interest in the trap that the Justice
Department launched an investagation into possible antitrust violations
because the inventor wanted to require that anyone who bought the trap also
needed the spring that comes with it.  Justice Department officials said
the trap would work just fine without the spring and that the inventor's
actions would prevent other manufacturers from entering the mouse trap
spring market.

After due consideration the inventor decided to cancell his plans to market
the trap and returned to his home in Arizona.

Plutonium - fat free, no cholesterol, zero calories

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