A Cultural Connection

wbwhite wbwhite at MADBBS.COM
Fri Feb 21 11:50:46 MST 2003

Hey Jim,

    Did you know about this?


>From The Onion

Iraq, Kentucky Vie For World Shooting-Into-The-Air Supremacy

COON HOLLOW, KY?In a rivalry that shows no signs of abating, Iraq and
Kentucky remain locked in a bitter struggle for world
shooting-into-the-air supremacy.

"I'll be damned if any Muslim's gonna beat the great state of Kentucky
at what she do best," said Coon Hollow resident Billy Joe Dupree, 39,
in between bouts of firing his shotgun skyward Monday. "We been
shootin' into the air for all kinds 'a reasons since they was a
Kentucky, and that's a fact. Why, even my wall-eyed cousin Mavis could
outshoot one o' them Muslims, and she ain't hardly finished the fifth

Aziz Hourani, 24, of Baghdad, took exception to Dupree's claims of
air-shooting superiority.

"Such is our anger at the Great Satan that we send many bullets into
the air every day," said Hourani, raising his AK-47 carbine and firing
several rounds. "No one can surpass us at shooting upwards?and
certainly not the Americans."

Though worlds apart geographically and culturally, Iraq and Kentucky
each boast rich traditions of vertical marksmanship.

"Expressing one's feelings and emotions via the firing of guns into the
air is an ancient and noble artform," said Henri St. Germain, president
of the Federation Internationale des Discharges-Aeriales (FIDA), the
sport's governing body. "In fact, it may even predate the practice of
expressing one's feelings and emotions by shooting into other humans.
And nowhere on Earth does this tradition continue to thrive more than
in Iraq and Kentucky. It is a vital part of these two unique cultures."

Continued St. Germain: "Whether shooting to celebrate a successful
moonshine heist from neighboring kinfolk or the downfall of an
imperialist Western regime, Kentucky and Iraq bring an undeniable
passion and pride to their craft."

According to FIDA officials, in head-to-head competition, Iraq and
Kentucky are closely matched.

"From a technical standpoint, the two competitors are virtually
dead-even, with different but equally strong styles," veteran FIDA
judge Olivier Resnais said. "The Iraqis' preference for automatic
military weapons give them the edge in rounds-fired-into-
the-air-per-minute, whereas the Kentucky double-barreled shotgun or
squirrel rifle has a much greater bore, allowing for a louder, more
full-bodied sound and a much greater weight of vertically propelled
lead per shot."

"In terms of vocal style, they are again different yet similar, with
the gun wielders of each region doing their best to drown out their
weapon's report through fervent yelling of their native calls," Resnais
continued. "Though they may have different meanings, the cries of
'Yeeeee-haw!' and 'Allahu akbar!' are, in spirit, not actually all that

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